SUNDARI PAVADAI

still u find time? then better start proceeding this blog!

Disclaimer: Sundari mentioned in this post is not to poke any 'Athiroopa Sundaris' in real time... this is just a real incident happened and I am cooking it with my ingredients added to serve u well... 

Contingency: It is my style of expressing 'real incidents' that might or might not have happened to me with an ' I ' perspective to entice readers.

It was another normal sunny weekday and I was engulfed amidst my busy schedule. I got a call from my friend (a gal ofcourse)

She: Hi how are you??

Me: Hello I am fine. What about you??

She: Where are you??

(The very moment when a gal never answers your question sequentially, u can very well guess that she is in trouble and she needs your help) 

Me: I am in office. You?

She: Look I need a favour?

Me: tell...

She: One of my friends from Bangalore is celebrating her birthday day after tomorrow. I wanna gift her something but I have to pay for it online. Need a net banker's help. So you pay for me now and ill repay u later.

Me: ofcourse I know tat. I will pay now. Tell me what to do?

She: I have ordered a dress for her. Jus login to Pothys, select the dress, pay and mail me the order details.

Me: Text me the site, user ID, password, shipping address, billing address, item description and others if any!

She: right away

Me: But I need her intro in return, deal?

She:(gave a silent pause proceeded by a 'hmm' to start) she is ENGAGED.

Me: ( S       I        L        E       N        T)

She: and she is getting married soon

Me: ( S            I                  L               E             N              T)

My mind was obsessed with fusillades of questions. My deal is scrapped ! Why should I help her? Questioned my ego.  Should I try further? goaded by testosterone. She is engaged  said the bloody inner s(hit)ubconcious.  So what en nanbanin nanban enakumnanban wont this be applicable for gals???

She: hello?!?

Me: hey I am leaving for an important meeting text me and I ll call u later

She: okay....

....with a small pause....

She: Thanks. you had lunch?

Me: jus now. You?

She: ok ill call u later. Bye

I felt ashamed that I can’t face myself in the mirror.

I received a message with her friend’s shipping address, her Pothys login ID, password....

….and finally the dress description... "Sundari  Pavadai"

What?????  

I went up and saw the shipping address again but her name was not Sundari.....

Then who is this Sundari?

I neither know Sundari nor her Pavadai.

I have no idea how to select a pavadai.
Neither I bought nor I used.

Immediately Ms.Google gave her stretching hands with " Did u mean athadi pavadai kathada?" My endurance and perseverance should serve me well.. I skipped through several pages but Google failed to present me ample details of a Pavadai...

I surfed for its images but my colleague behind me gave an ugly constipational look. I didn’t retaliate.

I tried  'Sundari ' with several permutations of 'Pavadai' and its related strings. (now for all those who are searching for sundari kindly finish this page)

Pothys displayed me several of her pavadai collections. I skimmed through all pavadais and randomly selected a red coloured pavadai, added it to cart, filled in the shipping details and  then 'pay now'.

  

"TRANSACTION ERROR"

"WHAT?" I uttered it so loud that made my colleague to reciprocate with another "WHAT?" of higher decibel than my “WHAT?”

To my horror I couldn’t pay her Pavadai after all my hard work. I received a message with “Due to insufficient funds your transaction was not successful ".

SHUCKS…!

I was dying in shame. I had a secondary option but I didn’t wanna use it, as the secondary option was the only reason for my bankruptcy. It was hardly a week the month has begun but I am already fucked up.

I lied in shame for a while and took a short nap. Several footages flashed in front of me without any celluloid being reeled. Everyone was laughing at me, she is chiding me with   " Oru pavadai vangithara mudila nee ellam... " and other unparlimentary strings.  Whole Bangalore was laughing at me. Her fiancé with flowers around his wrist dressed in groom suit gave me a sardonic ridiculing laugh.

I woke up shuddering. I have to help her as the gravity of the situation is my third degree integrity. I have no other option but to use my bhramasthram- the secondary option knowing its consequences.

Climax: I jumped into my wallet took my credit card and defrayed the pavadai .

PS: Thanks to credit card for helping me when I am bankrupt and 

       Fuck you credit card for my advance bankruptcy. 

PPS: I demand Google to have me as the only credible source of information for Sundari Pavadai.

(click pictures to have anenlarged vision)

Amala Paul in Black List

பப்  ப பபாப் பப் ப பாம்

பப் ப பபாப் பப் ப பாம்

பப் ப பபாப் பப் ப பாம்

பா....ம்!


shot thro my HTC Wildfire S



The moment I heard the tune of this song my body got re-energized back from its dehydrated condition which got slump due to the bumpy bus, pot hole roads and paaty with holes ( pokka pallu in tamil).

Half an hour before

She and her husband were so self minded that they took advantage of their stature of octogenarian , occupied the window seat and pushed me to the extreme end where I was almost playing a see-saw game with an inappropriate fulcrum and emotional soft corner for elders on one side and temperamental selfishness with desire to utilize my ticket fare fully on the other side. Her husband from the extreme end was trying hard to take his eyes-of-anger off me as though I ruined their comfort in a 3 seater seat. He made a generic talk with his wife about the youth of current generation and youth of his generation.

Him: youth of this generation are totally a menace

Me: (to myself-- rightly says the Anna Hazare) MUTE

Her: ஆமா நா . Especially between the age group of 18-25.

Me: (I wondered why 26 and above was made an exception. Maybe her son’s and grandson’s age were lying in both the extremes. ) MUTE

Unfortunately a girl of my age was reading something sitting in the adjacent row with ear phones plugged.

Him: பொண்ணுங்கள  கொற  சொல்லவே கூடாது .. அவா  எல்லாம்  பத்தரை மாத்து தங்கம்.

Her: ஆமா நா!

Me: (now WTH is this... does he ever know the meaning of பத்தரை மாத்து ??) MUTE

Him: எவ்வுளவு  sincere ah படிக்கறா ?

Her: ஆமா நா

My anger on these octogenarians made me feel envious about the girl and that fostered me to peep into her reading.

“Rajeshkumar novel- from header of right page

Marma Bangala- from header of left page“

I threw my sardonic smile upon the old man.

After several indefinite conversations a speed breaker gave me a call sheet for starring in their conversational feature. The moment I had a dash with her shoulder she started complaining about me to her husband. Her husband gave me a stare as though i did the biggest mistake in my life.

I was totally confused. Nobody is cuplable of taking the blame in this scenario. Neither the speed breaker nor the driver.

I started calculating the hours remaining for this hectic journey to end. I even started to tap my watch.

Half an hour later…. (television in bus)

பப் ப பபாப் பப் ப பாம்

பப் ப பபாப் பப் ப பாம்

பப் ப பபாப் பப் ப பாம்

பா....ம்!

The moment I heard the tune of this song my body got re-energized back from its dehydrated condition which got slump due to the bumpy bus, pot hole roads and paaty with holes ( pokka pallu in tamil).

I started shaking my head involuntarily and fingers tapping rhythmically to its beat. (I have no connection with Amala Paul in this ambit) I was enjoying the situation not only for her voluptuous movements and neither will I deny it. As time passes I started hearing a cacophonous verbal assail from the couple.

Him: Look how she is dressed? Look how she is showing?

Her: பெருமாணே..

Me: (அத ஏன் நீ பாக்ர?) MUTE

Him: look this guy is really enjoying it.

Her: இவா எல்லாம் மோசம்!

Me: (I was stupefied by her generic comment and slowly the amplitude of my shakings and tapings got reduced in a longitudinal fashion) MUTE

Him: என்ன பாட்டு இது? என்ன music இது?

Her: pee pee உதுராலாம்?

Me: (I wanted to blow a sangu) MUTE

Him: whats her name?

Her: என்ன எளவோ?

Me: its Amala Paul (i answered immediatly without being invited)...

The couple gave me an ugly stare in unison and i just wanted to shout " did i said இன்னிக்கி செத்தா நாளைக்கி பால் ?"

Him: why don’t u sing our favourite song? I am bored with this television.

Her: இப்ப வா??? போங்கனா…

Me: (where are my headsets?) MUTE

Him: hey பாட்ரீரீரீ?

Her: hmmmmm(with a prolonged sign of acceptance) seri..

She started aheming .. And god I have to stop it.

Me: THATHA.. நீங்க retire ஆகி எத்தன years ஆகுது?

Him: (gave me a sharp glance for interrupting his concerto) 25 years….(a little stubborn and pride in his baritone)

Me: ohh! More than my age? (and you are still alive?).. How many years it is since you are marr(i)ed? (clearing my throat to avoid conviction in my pronounciation)

Her: (started digging her face in shyness and gave the same look to her husband)

Him: (gave a laugh and) 70 years with 4 children 3 granddaughter and 2 grandson at your age.

I swiftly jumped into my analytical calculations and roughly figured their age of marriage. Probably he would have got married at 15 years when she was around 8 years or even less.

Thus I figured how Amala paul got into his black list.

He got married at the age when I was studying my 9^th standard. I was just entering my adolescence and 70 years before he just reached its culmination. So his generation will never understand the feelings of this generation and it is of no use in proving him wrong when he is satisfied with all he has done in his life and spending the last few years with his better half.

Him: ( …with a wild laugh of satisfaction..) இந்த மாதிரி TV பாக்கிறத விட்டுட்டு அந்த பொண்ணு மாதிரி (pointing his index finger to the Marma Bangala girl ) படிச்சி முன்னேறனும்.

Me: Seri THATHA*

* I just wanted to square root it off